Still Going Steady

We were a power couple, each ascending a staircase of accomplishments and recognition--life goals and dearly held desires seemed to be falling into our hands after years and years of hard work. But nothing compared to the "ordinary" love that came after the excitement of our 40s.

We've seen each other through death, loss, floods, and the educations (both scholastic and emotional) of all three of our kids. We've kissed the fuzzy young heads of our newborn grandchildren, helped each other get through great changes in our lives. We saw each other through an exodus from urban life to a retreat in the country. We said good bye to parents, pets, and friends who died too young. We've been together for 15 years now, married for 13. It never gets old.

What is it about this kind of love? This kind of love sneaks up on you, insinuates itself, doesn't swell like young love, but grows all the same. If anyone had ever told me that cancer would be more than a teacher, more than a burden, more than romantic--I don't think I could have believed it. But here we are, one year into his remission, and it just gets bigger by the day.

Life is full of disappointments and regrets, but this love doesn't have regrets. It just is--full of life, humor, patience, patience, and more patience. Still going steady, after all these years. Even on this, the subject of hair.

On the Subject of Hair

"There's many a man with more hair than wit."
Willliam Shakespeare

We called it a high forehead that set your blue eyes
Out like sapphires on a porcelain dish, but then
came the cancer and so much more was lost
Eyebrows, chest hair, other nooks never considered

Even your arms were smooth of their soft fur
Even your lap went naked as a peeled peach
In contemplative moments, I sat beside you
On the bed, counting each stubborn remainder

I thought if the cancer was in the hair, I was glad
To be done with it, I came to look at you as
A warm marble statue that slept in a nautilus curl
I tried to memorize the sitting navy of blue veins

Until they blew the big one and the pic line went in
You insisted on walking out of the hospital that day
Regal as a lion, your unfurnished chest thrown out
Leading with your handsome, hairless chin

How could I ever love you more?